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Hercules (Timon and Pumbaa at the Movies Version)
Transcript *Timon: Well, enough of that. (pauses it after the title and begins fast forwarding it) *Pumbaa: Timon, what are you doing? *Timon: I'm fast forwarding to the part where we come in! *Pumbaa: But you can't go out of order! *Timon: (un-pauses it to see Hercules battling a head-slicing dragon) Au contraire, my porcine pal. I've got the remote! *Pumbaa: But everyone's gonna get confused! We gotta go back to the beginning of the story! (rewinds it) *Timon: We're not in the beginning of the story. (pauses it and sees two goats and fast forwards it) *Pumbaa: Yes we we're. The whole time. (pauses it to see Phil impressing the ladies) *Timon: Yeah, but they don't know that. (pauses it to see Panic wearing shoes) *Pumbaa: Then why don't we tell our story? *(They both pause to see Hades pointing at Mt. Olympus, causing them to scream and dive into their seats. They stand up.) *Timon: Hey. I got an idea. Why don't we tell him our story? *Pumbaa: I'd like the sound of that. *Timon: A little backstage tour. Take 'em behind the scenes for a revealing and intimate a look in the story within the story! *Pumbaa: 'Cause what they don't know is how we really were there even though they didn't know we were there! You know? *Timon: And I couldn't have said it myself! *Pumbaa: So does this mean we're going back to the beginning! (stops rewinding to see that the Walt Disney Pictures logo is in reverse) *Timon: Oh no, Pumbaa. No. We're going way back to before the beginning. (cues the title "Hercules: With a Twist!") Transcript 2 *Pumbaa: The museum of heroes! *Timon: So majestic. *Pumbaa: So powerful! *Timon: So...bizarrely named. (pauses it) Pumbaa, how can a museum of heroes be an actual museum? *Pumbaa: Well, I think it's because a museum is what I like to call the famous identity of true heroes. *Timon: Heroes like Hercules! *Pumbaa: Oh, you mean "Him-ules"? *Timon: Yeah, Pumbaa. It ain't pretty. Transcript 3 *(TV goes static. It changed into a guy taking a crap in the toilet.) *Timon: Hey, what's going on? Pumbaa, you're sitting on the remote! *Pumbaa: Huh? Oh, sorry. I thought it was a brownie. Transcript 4 *Timon: How convenient. Phil, Philip or Phillip. *Pumbaa: Call that a nickname! *Timon: That's it. No more fortune cookies for YOU! Transcript 5 *Pumbaa: (pauses the scene to see Hercules battling a slice-headed dragon) You mind if I pause that for a second? (leaves Timon alone and Timon began to sing "The Gospel Truth" just as he comes back) Were you picking your nose? *Timon: No, I had an itch on the inside! Transcript 6 *Timon: (singing) Hercules! Hercules-- wait a sec. (pauses the "Zero to Hero" song sequence) Pumbaa, where's the grub? (Pumbaa vomits.) You just can't help yourself, can you? *Pumbaa: Sorry! *Timon: Okay, but this time, show a little self control. Transcript 7 *Meg: Stop this before we-- *(A pause can be heard. Timon is sad about Hercules' kissing scene with Meg.) *Pumbaa: Timon? Are you crying? *Timon: I'm fine! I—I just have something in my eye. *Pumbaa: {holding out a hanky} Here, blow. *Timon: Ohh. {blows his nose; hands the hanky back} Here, Pumbaa. *Pumbaa: {sarcastically} Gee, thanks. *Timon: {getting a hold of himself} Okay. I'm better. Transcript 8 *Hades: Olympus is that way! *Timon: (chuckles after pausing it) Heh heh heh. Let's cut to the chase, shall we? Transcript 9 *Timon: (pauses the scene to see Hercules about to be going dead saying sorry to Meg) What is with the running? If you can call that running! *Pumbaa: I was giving you time to catch up. *Timon: You big lug! (unpauses it) Transcript 10/Ending *Timon: Well, that's it. A medieval wrap-up, the grand super mega epic finale! To all that often about endings; Pumbaa, they come at the end. *Pumbaa: Can we watch it again? *Timon: Pumbaa, we just saw it! Maybe tomorrow. Category:Timon and Pumbaa At The Movies Segments